TOM!...Space, i need more focking space!!

sup bitches :D. i had a wockod time on friday and i shall be telling you what i did......i actually wrote this blog before all nice and long and detailed....then my computer froze because its not very good anymore due to a thing called pornography! :P. so ill write it again in less detail. i met ste and phil at sutton station....saw the usual totty there as i waited....its like rapists heaven on the train.....in sutton, i had to collect a thing with my dad from there post depot.........FUCK ME!!!! i never realised it was there in sutton, and its so big...not to mention the town hall, when the fuck did that get there...there goes all our council tax :P. anyhoo...i got on the train, we went to madhouse joking about stes mum and the drink driving poster lmao...and then ste RENTED A BASS :D. and the room was alright for once...Room 8, tax it kids its good, has a sofa and an averagly good drum kit!. we set up....the one problem was there cymbal...it sounded a bit choked...as for my one...it was absolutley mashed...theres a hole in it and its ripped slightly lol....its an old one tho....and now sounds alot like a trash cymbal which is quite cool :P. we tried to play in the dark but phil and ste got scared and put the lights back on...i threw a stick at phil in the dark...and when the light went back on it was on the floor snapped in two..and madhouse didnt have any, so i jst used a broken one, cudent b rsed to go n get one from sound control. but its was brilliat...WE PLAYED DAMMIT AND ROCK SHOW ALL THE WAY THROUGH....wait for it, get this,..... with STE on BASS :D. it fucking owned, we perfected dammit and pretty much have rock show..me and phil can also play there is by boxcar racer perfectly. were gona learn feeling this and the anthem part 2 next. but it owned....it was so hot tho. i did a few solos as usual when everyone else is collapsed on the floor from tiredness i keep going :P. get my moneys worth!. then we had drinks, we toasted ste, then i toasted phil, and then ste and phil toasted me...then we all toasted s-punk...ownage. then we messed about with the glade jelly....had a glade jelly fight, and the wall got totally splattered...i scraped it off the wall and put it back into the box lol!!! no harm done;). then we packed up and fucked off...my god the woman at madhouse is hot..the young one, blonde hair, peircings and tatoos she has...i would :P. then we departed with phil after seeing chris wright and got on the train...the ticket inspector was rude with my ticket (yes you heard me right....RUDE WITH MY TICKETT) and so i stuck my fingers up at him when he had his back turned...as i went to put them down he turned back around...i think iwas jst quick enough lmao :D.
then ste went home courtosy of my dads lift (not an actual lift). the end.
and so you see...when my parents caught me with my penis out, i wasnt masterbating i was just cleaning it and it went off.

Tom

yesterday was great fun even if it was short. here is WAPPENED.
i spoke to tallis the night before because i needed to know what was going on and where and when we were meeting...she had to goto doctors and wanted to meet at 1....however i had to go home at 3.30..so i was like: thats not very long, shall we meet after your doctors...when will that finish, errr 11...so i said meed at 11. however there was confusion and supposedly it was whan....so i had to wait at tallis's house until she got back lol...sorry tallis for getting the time "wrong"...although tallis even admitted she was glad i did :). anyhoo. met up with tallis. she showed me her furry fluffy ball of hair.... (a rabbit), as the other one was too shy to come out lol :). then eventually we walked into sutton, talking about many topics...including: anchorman qoutes, what wud happen if i was a hermafradite and i self bred....firemen ...etc. then we got some sweets from woolies. tallis chose most of them cuz i made her...we totaly destroyed the pick n mix thing...and we squished so many sweets into a big bucket so it bulged at the bottom, using my special technique...hey kids, you wana get your MONEYS WORTH :). then there were no big bucket lids...cuz me and tallis are hardcore like that, we managed to force a small lid onto a big bucket...score. that made us laugh lots...and then we were told at the counter she already knew and we could have had a bag instead.....*long pause after she told me that **looks at tallis smirking**....*. got sweets (lol GOT MILK!). we had to do paper, scissors, rock to decide which carpark to goto....accept because me and tallis r so dam alike we picked the same ones 4 times....i was like, third time round, we just used scissors...she wont use it again. and tallis was like : he wont go for scissors again he will go for summet else....and, uh oh.., in the end she won :D. so we went upto the slightly less posher, but still cool Tallis Carpark...and threw sweets off that, then some dude came along who worked there...and we tried to be casual by looking at the floor eating sweets out the pot...but he told us in polite words to fuck off :D. on the lift door it had the word: PUSSY written, that made it the better car park for me lol :). then we went to the par cark of tom :D. we saw a yellow porsche....by the way guys, tallis hates some shades of yellow, and especially orange....lol. we threw some sweets at cars...tried to hit a pole from distance with one, just missed. tried to hit some shazes....was close again, just infront of them, but they didnt notice...then a security man shouted: OI!!!!!!!!!!!!. so we legged it....i thought, best not be predictable...so we took the lift. there was a cool mirror in the lift so we had some photos in there lol. (nothing else ;D). and then walked away from the lift hastily but trying to act un suspicious...and then went into clintons as a checkpoint :D. then we went around places, she saw stuff which she liked and it was like only £3.50 or £5 so i offered to buy it for her but she declinedddd..alot lol :). then we ran for the bus lol. and met phil and jess there. twas fun, i threw a sweet from point blank at jess's face....cuz she threw a load at me lmao. then me and phil talked bout jess's mum having sex...in her face as she tried to tallis, and our tactic to put her off worked. we all had a few more sweets...joked about stuff. and we had a game of laughing at not v funny things...for example, errr, stuff like: cheap ride..60p. on the bus. stuff like tht, we went to oasis, tallis saw a wockod lip ring for £4....and we were gona go n get it after oasis...but we didnt have time, hopefully sum1 else with £4 to spare will buy it her as she wants it and will probably goto town before she next see's me in town. then we went into oasis (not the drink, or the holiday park). and then into the shop next to it...like fuck i can remember the name, tallis unfolded a t shirt...and the woman spent ages folding it, so she was determined to re fold it...she did a good job but the woman woudent employ her other then work experience...and omg....the woman was so hot. and she was bent foreward showing tallis and jess belts, so i went up behind her...her trousers were hanging so far off her ass you could basicly see her anus...what a site, i called phil over, and even jess got a look...tallis admitted she was hot too...i fucking would have. :D:D:D:D. and then we got some money out of phils wank i mean bank...tallis pretended to rob the bank...and i shouted: GET YOUR TITS OUT...to the builders working on the retunder...they all looked ovet he edge and waved and thumb's upped me :D, we also saw adam and holly :)..then we went to the bullshit, sorry i mean boring...sorry, my bad :) BULLRING. jess went and brought stuff..tallis fell in love with a huddie but didnt have £25. then we saw adam and holly again...had some photo with naked manakins...and then ran to catch the bus...phil and jess were lazy so me and tallis pegged it to hold up the bus till they got there. i almost ran into a car on the way up and tripped myself up aswell lmao :D. made it tho. then on the bus tallis slept...we stroked jess's hair to piss her off, she claimed wed make it greasy..then we got a newspaper, and put three finger holes thru page three..tits and fanny, and then tallis took a picture of it with out fingers thru...phil claimed the tits so i was the fanny...then this man had a clentched fist..and looked like he was wanking air...so i put my finger thru the middle and moved it up and down to make it look like he wasd wanking my finger...this amused people :D. then i woke tallis up by playing porn really loud down her ear lol!!! she looked before i could do it well tho, and then i played it by jess...so everyone turned around on the bus to look at her lol!!. then i shouted big balls, fanny hair...and people turned round.,..and looked at me and phil..so we looked away pretending it wasnt us...then this fucking HOT girl got on the bus....all 4 of us WOULD HAVE...boned her, at the same time....in a ally way....quickly... lol. then i had to get off the bus and go home. The End.....and so thats how i got stuck down the well with no trousers on :D

Tom

hey there every whan....i shall be describing the friday i had using steven hawkings arsehole as a talking aid...after all he did ruin my lunch *long story if you never saw the posters at school*. right then. leavers day. went to phils in the morning, the lazy bugger had just got up. had a small shat with him then he FORCED me to watch and laugh at pokemon while he showered...and lets face it, most probably pissed at the same time. then he came down all smart. he had his hair cut i think it looks cool but he doesnt like it. from the back he looked a bit like a maths teacher when he was dressed all smart. i was cool smart...untucked blk shirt, blk trousers...vans, silver/grey tie...you know its right. then we started to walk to school with my bag full of his textbooks...then we saw mike and craig. walked with them for a bit. then saw tallis and adam. i hadnt seen tallis in aaages so i got a nice big hug off her. she looked beautiful as always, adam looked rather smart, mike was cool'ly dressed and craig had school uniform on. shook his huge hand. then arrived eventually at school. handed the books in, saw everyone,ness looked like a secatary :). then we had a few photos and we saw rob bayliss and chris wright. saw the legendary stagulento. handed books in. then we went upto our form rooms. fuck me lisa butterworth....i would ;). and then we had awards, and because sophie ward did them only the trendies got any awards, apart from chris wright who got joint class clown. even tho i blatently had more votes sophie gave charlotte wilson best boobs..oh well, she does have a pretty nice pair tbh tho :P.then we all went down for the assembly.....it wasnt a leavers assembly, it was a fuckin comedy show!!. all the teachers telling stories, poems etc. mr bates made a comment about how he wanted to be the only gay one in a pink shirt but ashley was in one...and he pointed him out and called him gay,LEGEND!.then it was last and most certainly least (as Mr king used to say) mr parkinson.....he had to mention the time rob bayliss jokingly chased me across the quad saying he was gona spank me, before p.e. but ooooh no! he got the story wrong, and said that we came in after p.e saying we had been spaking people...way to make me look gay, oh well at least i know i like porn such as: www.pinkworld.com lmao sorry just proving a point hope you didnt click on it.. but he did say the word COCKS, and everyone seemed so shocked that he swore..but that was cool., then everyone started to leave...the stupidness of everyone getting all emotional for a second time lol. i said bye to parky...asked to shake his hand, as he went to shake it i pulled my hand away and did the dickhead signal and said: see you in sixth form....then walked off into the sun...then i met up with phil at the gate after i had got my bag. and we walked to his, saw tallis again, told her the plan for madhouse (chris had already been informed). got changed at phils, he got changed. tallis phoned us, she didnt have enough money for train...and even tho we said we would pay for her on the train....she insisted on getting he bus *sighs* lol. walked to the station, met chris.phil had a go at me cuz i said would you to a hot girl across the road and all he saw was the granny infront of us and he thought i was being harsh...*cough* nob lol. got on the train, chris had his acoustic, i had my cymbal and sticks and phil had his guitar in his.,..wait for it...NEW GIG BAG...we went to sound control and met tallis there, she was with her bf stumpy when we came out. so we wated round the corner so they could say there buhbyes in private., then i thought...oh he can come madhouse if he wants, and when i went round the corner to ask him he had already goneee. went upto madhousee (the house of madness) and got the usual cymbals....they fell out the bag as i only got hold of one handle and the bag was open lol. saw MINI JESUS!!!! he was waiting to do a drum exam, that sounded like fun =]. all i have to say is fuck room 5.....the toms kept slipping down, and took forever to get on, which annoyed phil at the time it took to set up, and then the hit hat slipped down after like 5 seconds so basicly could play fuck all....and the heat in that room, jesurrrsh...it must have been tallis ;). but yehr, we did a few songs...phil was too tired, tallis went to sleep, so i just did some drumming by myself, and then the legend that is christephor james robert wright the 3rd of want and fame did some stand up comedy and sex talk lol. was very funny.then eventually we left, chris rushed off as he had to teach his cousin guitar and had to rush off back to sutton. so it was just me, spud and ex wife. went to mcdonalds. tallis said she was hungry but didnt want me to buy her anything, but i know what she likes and so i got it for her and she was blatenty starving...we span around on the chairs upstairs..played with the ice in the drinks...we had an extra coke so we whacked it between us. i joked that tallis being seductive with ice made me hard and poured the ice all over my crotch...shame there was still a bit of coke left IN THERE....lol that must have looked like i pissed myself to the untrained eye :D. then we took tallis to the bus stop, and we got the train as we had a return...then our day was made...hot girl, big boobs,  low cut top...late for the bus..RUNNING...oh yes...she tried to hold them still but how thy duss jiggle.... twas brilliant, made my day, maed phils week. then we got train back. went back to phils...strocked up on alcohol and then went to Erectory park. saw everyone there.met them by the playarea. i tried to jump onto a moving swing...mistimed it and it and it came back and hit me in the chest lmao...it left a iddy biddy stratch ;0.then people went to buy more alcohol, and i ran into jad and knocked some beer on her white top...looked like i had spermed in her mouth and it dribbled down lol!!! her words not mine :D. so sorry jad. twas fun, apart from tallis got started on by chavs while she was waiting for us, so she wasnt in the bestest of moods...and then i was bent over behind jess and phil pushed her, and she landed aqwardly lol. then these younun' chavs were kicked a football too close to us, so when other people reutrned we started on them. they called phil a little prick lol :D. then the issue was resolved by a game of football...all i have to say...me, craig and mike...= OWNAGE. fuck me we such go pro, sod ronaldiniho the bit toothed bastard....weve got..TOMALDINIHO!!!. we skilled there asses. and one of them got upset cuz i owned him with a perfectly good slide tackle. then we stopped. and phil ran into a load of bushes and bounced back..so i thought it looked fun and ran over and joined in...then me , mike, craig and phil all ran into the  bush at the same time...tallis filmed it :). i tried to bring it down by holding onto it as i fell back lol. then the slightly drunken emma said she liked my moobs...so we ran into eacother trying to swap them. eventually the time came for me to leave. craig and some other dude who was cool but fuck can i remember his name :D, walked me towards where i was getting picked up, i was worried about tallis going back on her own tbh, but thankyou for walking me to my car :). she did get started on aswell which makes me feel really bad so...SORRY TALLIS!
but yehr, i hear the party was pretty fucked up and amusing after tht. just for rob bayliss....ANOTHER LONDON DAY...

Tom
RANDOM PICTURE: tis random, tis a pictuee but at least its not nudity eh bayliss ;)

MOOORNING ALLL *says loudly in mr bridgewood voice*....on friday i had one of the sexiest days ever. twas angels and airwaves and my good mates phil, ste and jon which made it own...heres what happened.
i went to hungry horse about lunchtime waiting for phil to finish his exam...i had some chocolate ice cream whilst mocking my sister about the dyke she is lol oj....and then i foned phil, and he said i could come over...and he told me he had a cheese toastie..and my sister goes: oh, he shud have a sandwich with cheese and ham its nice...put ham in it...and i was like, laura its a toastie...and she wasnt listening...so i handed the phone to her and phil shouted at her for her lack of knowladge between baked break and cold floppy cock bread...then i got dropped off at fullops....he got ready, listened to AVA...foned ste and jon to arrange to meet them at the station. went down to the station, we saw two fit girls...one was phils neighbour, i said would you too loud and he got all upset tht she may have heard me...i was like, go round to her house with flowers and condoms....say your sorry for your rude mate..then do her on the kitchen work surface....simple. then we got to station...two old women were trying to book tickets for next friday to sumwhere..pure nightmare...took so long, asked so many questions...phil had bad gayfever. met yan and then ste...then we went and brought our tickets from the machine...phil became lord of the flap...and he lifted it up for all of us to get our tickets...well done, then i absolutley caught ste with a slap...but he got me back later...so i chased him down the platform making him beg for mercy...in the end we settled it over a hotpot lol....got on le train. we were by some gangster chavs yerh...i kept touching stes knee by accident...the dick sat opposite= no leg room....got off the train. walked towards mcdonalds....phil and jon got there food before us in a shorter que...we were stuck behind some fat shaz buying the whole fffffffucking place....ste wanted some kind of sandwich...and an asian woman served him...she goes: WHITE OR BROWN...BREAD?..ste just looked at me and we both burst out laughing...she kept asking, in the end he controlled it enough to say white,...which was funny cuz he wanted brown, but couldent bring himself to say it.... (he should have just poimted at her face lol oj harsh)...then we went upstairs to find phil and yan....we ate our food...phil made me and ste put as many chips in our mouth at one time as possible.....it was a close one...you could feel the salt running to your heart after chewing the whole bloodey box in one go....then phil and ste sexed up a lady the other side of the orange plastic wall..he put his drink by his crotch and ste drank from it..i think it was tht way round, i cnt remember....met up with garner...he tried to save us a space in the que with his mates but a fat woman was going mental and didnt want us to push in lol...then we went to get in the que.....holy fuck man. this was the best que ever. we were all owning eacother...phil slapped me really hard after i slapped him for a bad comment....and ste was like owned.. then ste got me with a biggun...so i pushed him into this garage thing lol....then we tried to give jon a nipple twister...and i missed, and his natural reaction was to swing a kick into my balls.......oh man that hurt soooooooooo much. i was almost crying lying on the floor. then his hot girl came round handing out leaflets...so i went : will you kiss them better for me...she jusy gigled and walked away...probably thinking *nervous giggle* holy fuck i hate this job, get this pedo away from me .....and then i used a classic on phil, whats tht on the offspring logo *he looks down* *finger goes up to hit him in the nose*...then the people infront started laughing at us and saying stuff too us, one was red headed and fat, one girl thin and small, one lankey dude and one small dude.....and then as the que progressed we got more leaflets...we made ste eat one....then the redheaded girl threew a plane onto phils foot...and she was giggling, and phil goes...tom ste come here...he just wispers to use : "and the funny thing is.........shes FAT"...lmfaooooo, the way he said it,...so funny. then we saw stumpy tallis's bf. then i met up with this girl i know called claire who i met off thinternet and shes cool. met her and this lad who seemed to be gay...we put our hands between her tits...many introductions to the lads....jon and phil went to get drinks....talked to claire some more..about general rude and perverted crap lol. then phil and jon returned...drank the drinks, then phil tried to spill mine, so a mass spilling of coke broke out in the crowd...then we got in the right que to get in...got inside, these girlsd were handing flyers out, so i took one off the hottest one., and she went, thankyou *smiles*,...i went...no luv, thaaaaaaaankYOOU!..she giggled oh yes...someone wanted a bit of my cock tickling her throat lmao oj...its too late now, im sure you pictured it....got inside. got a decent position....it quickly heated up. we got near the front about the middle...i shouted stuff to try and get further foreward but it didnt really work...e.g IM ON MY PERIOD...CRIMZON SEA DUDES, DONT PISS ME OFF....and. IM PREGNANT, YOUR SQUASHING YHE BABY YOU BASTARDS.....it didnt work,. then some guy shouted lettuice...so i shouted cabbage pussy!!!. it made some nearby hot girls laugh :D. shouted some more...there were two hot small emo girls infront of them...had my dick up her ass...and ste shouted: MAN ITS SO HOT IN HERE, YOU COULD SQUEEZE A GIRLS ASS AND THEY WUDENT REALISE....as the girl infron turned to face ste i groped her ass....score lol....then we found a camera on the floor, then jon was like...whos is this, we didnt know so he just threw it in the air behind him LMAO....it hit sum1 i think....then cord came one...they were shitttt....we shouted things like: well yehr thanks for visiting exits on the right...and: CUT THE CORD....abilical!!!...also: DONT LET THE DOOR HIT YOUR ASS!....it made loads of people around me turn round and laugh...cuz we all bum tom delonge and im a bit like him on the rudeness scale so people liked it.then the bastards at the front had all the water...cuz they stupid acadamy people were handing them drinks...they were wearing yellow and i wanted some water so i shouted...OI MUSTARD...OI COLMANS BASTARD....OI YELLOW MOTHER FUCKER GIVE ME SOME WATER.....THE BABYS DYING IT NEEEEEEDS WATER...GIVE ME SOME FUCKING WATER.....BE KIND IM SMALL!!!!!. then they threw back empty cups....so everyone gave them to me...i threw them up and vollied them at cord and the front rows with my hand...i got near the foot of the emo lead singer of cord...hit a mustard pig on the head...then ste and jon got cups off there heads...was so funny, just the way they bounced off their heads...then jon got in there with the two girls...go jon. eventually cord pissed off back to norwich (yessssssssssssssssssssss) and it was time for AVA. we shouted many things such as....GET THY WADS OUT!!!!!....and TILF!!!!.....AVA were wockod...the girls wanted us but me ste and phil were just sweaty and wanted to see angles and airwaves instead...so yan was left to do the dirty deed on his own lol...i was boxed in between 4 people....so warm i felt like being sick but gota stay there and listen to A&A.the had a wockod set...i went to the back to get two cokes with ste and sit out the door to cool down for a sec...sat on the floor and sang along to there is by boxcar....atom was wockod, used his blue and white orange county kit...he span his sticks in the air...we were near the back to see the encore..the one we wanted to see..luckily we find a place to stand where we could see...ste stood infront of this hard guy by accident and he pushed ste out the way..i was like, what the fuck was that for asshole...THE WAR....was by far the best, everyone sang along....twas wkd. then we went outside and met up with phil in the pre arranged place...opposite academy by toys r us...althought jon clearly didnt hear us...fucking great. lol. he was busy with the ladies...we met up with him, saw claire one last time but then she went...dam her non soaking with her and 30 other peoples sweat...cuz she was on the balcony ofcourse..................................................................................gay. lol. then this dude tripped over and dropped some coke on the floor...phil and ste dared me to lick it...so sorry kids. im sick, and never back down from a dare...just like when ste and phil dared me to eat some of phils dog food...grose man. then we waited by the tunnel for my dad...sat down on the wall...i climbed it and jumped onto the fence lol....then this dude dropped a bottle of water..it had a tiny bit and he didnt notice and walked off....what did phil do, down it lol!!!. then we got lifts home...hearing my dad swearing, and seeing a rubber tyre factory burn....slowley we got rid of them all, and then we were home...yesssssss, i just collapsed. and then got up again....cleaned myself up...watched world cup highlights...then collapsed..oh and  had a quick poop lol!!!! im sure you all wanted to know tht, but a guys gotta go kids....lol.
one awesome day....

Tom

hellow all. as i am a sad dick who hates being alone in his own house when i could be doing summet with mates i tried to arrange something to do after the history exam on thursday...however no one was free/no one wanted to do anything...so i was walking home with ste...who walks the same way, ste invited me to come to dueys house...but i was like i dont wana invite myself or invade....but then the hoff asked me in (blatently to fuck me with his stash of condoms under le bed) and im glad he did to be honest, was an awesome day. me and ste and du-ey went into his back garden to play some basketball.....we played a game called pig...you get a letter everytime you miss, and you have to go further back each time.....i lost but co incidently i scored a basket later on while hoff and du-ey were talking...and it was from really far away and they were like..........oh yes tommy!!! what a basket man, how the fuck did you get that in..*puts cool shades on* well you know lol. then we were having a kick about...and i tried to put my foot on a moving ball, i have no grip on my vans cuz theyre worn away...so i slipped and went onto my arse and slit into a bush lol!!! kodak moment. hoff kicked in his window on his shed by smashing the ball into it lmao..hoff showed us his guitar talents at plaing whats my age again by blink 182, then we got to listen to his wockod music he wrote with his cousin, and then saw a video of them jamming at madhouse, was sexual... my arm was cut from earlier and hoff was wearing a white england home shirt, i must have rubbed against him, cuz he turned around and he had a masive gash of dried on (now brown) blood...lmfao, ste tried to hold in the laughter..then we told he hoff and he almost cried when he saw it in the mirror....then ste had to go for a business studies exam....hoff kicked the ball and it went  flying into his kitchen, where he smashed a tape recorder...fully broken lol!!!, we managed to fix it tho. then i was chasing a ball down to stop it going into du-eys pond...i slipped on the grass, tried to balance myself on a slab over the pond (ofcourse the slab has to be a loose one not properly secured) the slab slides into the pond and takes my right leg in with it lol!!....then when i took my shoe off there was a tadpole squirming about in my shoe...we put it back lmao....we couldent stop laughing....stuart almost cried, and he even foned anna his girlfriend to tell her about it it was tht funny....this was the main event aside many over funny moments, it was just one of those funny days cuz the hoff is a comedic legend...so to ste the stag,....me and hoff played fifa 06...and i hadnt played it before, so i lost 3-0 first game....bit better in the second game although it was 4-0 i pranged the post and bar and made hoffs keeper shit it plenty...if i had had a fifth game i would have been ok...then stu and me played together on englands side.....we lost 2-1 against spain...and I scored the goal...we went mental, his shot was deflected and i was rooney and i just walked it past the keeper into the net....absolute mental celebration...and my moment of skill....did loads of turns...then, ahem *mumbles* accidently pressed X and the ball went out of play.....then we went to play more footy and basketball....hoff got his acoustic guitar out and we made up songs for the frogs in his pond. brilliant.! then i got a special one off life performance of his music...hes so good at singing and writing songs..then ste the stag came back. we played football some more, and then ste tried to beat hoff at fifa...and ste took the lead... then stu had a shot deflected wide, the game had a glitch and it said it was a goal...ste was gutted as he had never beaten duey..lol. then stag scored again!! YESS...we went mental celebrating, then stu scored two...and near the last minutes from the edge of the area ste let off a great drive into the top corner to level it...3-3!!!! we celebrated like mad, diving on eacother lol!!! penalty shootout to decide it...ste wanted to skip the intro but pressed shoot...so his first penatly jst went streight at the keeper....then hoff bagged his...ste sucked at penatlys...hoff saved them all but one....they were tied...ste had to score to take it into sudden death. his controller did the vibrate thing...and then he went and hit it streight at the keeper..OWNED...the hoff won.we looked at a funny condom brochure of all the different types...fucking hell........ then me and stag had to go and we left and walked towards my house..the end. one of the funniest days i have had in ages!!! so thanks to THE STAG...and THE HOFF.

Tom

hey there youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuw *huge hand comes out of screen and pokes you into the nose*, last friday i went out,...and this is what i did :D. sorry about the delay to anyone who could give a shit (so really im not sorry at all), my computer is semi broken..just like dan quinney is semi circumsised. right then....fuck where do i start, might aswell start from after my history exam...i was sat next to phil and could see tallis (her beauty was a distraction) and i wrote two full bookletts (yes thats right kids...18 pages of bullshit and crap. and then phil stuck his leg out to stretch and tripped up an invidulator or however you spell it..still..lmao!. and phil got his calculator yoinked...the woman was like..is this a scientific calculator....and you dont need it, im having that, i always wanted one of these. man it is too hot at the moment...which signals tennis's biggest event...wimbledon..the most boringest shit youll ever watch...seriously tho, when you take a crap, if you just look down at mr brown and his friend of to the coast....your watching wimbledon underwater...(well it could be wimbledon the boat if its a floater lol ). anyhoo...afterwards we saw a load of people...including emma green, who was so red from sunburn she looked like a featherless chickon lol. then we all walked home...at one point it was just me, phil and tallis...and phil was about to go, and talls had her blazer over her head like a non/semalian preacher...and me and phil were like..why?. and she said "to stop the sun burning my head"..me and phil went "its not burnt tho, let us see" then she showed us and we joked "holy fuck....you so burnt...shit, did sum1 pour like boiling water on your head...shit man, thats really bad"..then she sat on the floor with her blazer over her..crouched up like a black mouse..and i bent over and said"...comon tallis, weel get you back to your house and get some nice cream for your head (winks to phil )and then i said summet else treating like her a kid and then i was like" all i need you to do is get up..comon tallis, i can see you..i can see you, are you laughing...DUDE!" and eventually she came out of her tardis....byes were said to phil then i went back to tallis's with her..i was trying to say the sentence..."got a lovley young lady from sheffield, shut up your not gonna put me off, step upto the oche...double top for the win" and i just couldent stop saying lung instead of young...but eventually i managed to get it out. then at tallis's we both got changed...naked together after light sexual pleasure lol!! oj tallamundo decided to change again as she didnt like how she looked evem tho she looks really beautiful in anything she wears...then she did her makeup again and answered phone calls...i talked to her cool brother while she did this. we chatted about forumula 1 and blowup parrots lol. then me and tallis departed from the goodship her house to the bus stop, where we met amy...and then Jad hopped onto le bus. tit was boilinggggg on the bus as we were clever dicks and sat at the front where the most windowage was....then we got off bus and went to the pidgeon park...we saw the biggest pidgeon ever...bench lol oj. he was there along with jess, geeney and ness....eveeyone but me seemed dressed for the heat pretty much...shorts...sleevless tops. single thickness tampons lol oj  tbh if stuff like this offends you you probably dont get along too well with me...twas fun in the park..we wore my school clothes, filmed random videos....jad had a strip athon to see how quickly she cud take off all my school clothes..tallis filmed it but a fone call inturrupted filming so it was not all caught..we all fought bench and put suncream on his arse...that really pissed the crazy crocodile off... we also covered tallis's privates in leaves....danced over her lol....err what else..ther were some people trying to street dance and do flips and stuff...so we mimic'ed them....then we got drinks from mcdonalds...i got tarrrleeesh one...i was worried/annoyed tho cuz she wudent let me buy her anything to eat and she hadent had owt since a few days ago..and she had a headache most likley from not eating...jad also punched me in the face...kicked me in the mouth...etc. so i floored her a load of times.tallis took pictures of me and her and she had a cap on..she looked pretty as usual cuz shes photogenic like tht...i looked like a spack as usual...eventually after a while bench and jess fucked off...and jad went to get emma, geeney went and got us sprite and WKD's.i have to settle like two issues that were brought up...i stay alcohol free cuz i dont need it to be COOL ,....and why do people say i have nice eyes...ive seen them my whole life and i can say i dont think theyre that nice, tallis has nice eyes tho..then after more acrobatics and hugs tallis got sexed up by many asian people as she went to the toilet...they shouted things at her...and a stupid shaz said stuff too because she was ugly and jellous because she didnt want to be a chav but shes dumb so she set fire to herself and welded her cheap adidass tracksuit to her legs and repulsive body. then eventully amy, greenie, and ness all left to go meet up with people to go and drink....jad ofcourse forgot until later that amy had her keys..................*dissapointed sigh lol* then eventually we decided to get the busssssss home...this drunken irish man and his cousin got on...and when emma and jad moved closer to me and tallis when the bus started to de clutter he started talking to them...he asked emma her name and she wudent tell him...and he took photos of her..and i went, that could also be considered as pedophillic.....and he goes, just cuz your gay *que everyones jokes of me fucking tallis* and then he started to smoke...and i said to tallis: "what does this sign say tallis...minimum (i missread the word maximum okay tallis..your clever im dumb leave me alone lol oj) fine for smoking £500...." he just gave me absolute evils...the bitch who drove the bus was such a fanny brush.....she cudent drive for shit (not that youd want to) she had more breakdowns then a widdow.....and eventually she just gave up in sutton...so we walked the rest...it was just me, emma, jad and tallis then...tallis told me in the pollitest manner to fuck off when she was on the fone so i went to talk to emma...she said i do good mr bean impressions...and tht i shud be mr bean.then emma and tallis left us to goto emmas...so i walked to the COOP with Jad...we met up with amy to get jads keys...and i saw...THE SPUD....me and phil seemed quite hyper compared to everyone else. but me and phil r just like that...and thats the way it is..HUGHR *thrusts*. then i got picked up from there...and got a fucking massive lecture from my parents for being in b ham too late...they said if it wasnt for angels and airwaves next friday theyd ground me...ooo wow, ive pissed myself in fear.....that was about it reeeeeealy. thanks for reading,...unless you skipped to the end,..in which case.fuck off jerk...you cant keep cheating in life...or ill just cheat on your mum you chav,.....anyhoo.

Tom.

RANDOM PICTURE: tis random, tis a picture....enjoy

hello all, i shall be explaining to all ye piratys what harrrpened on wednesday. it was good, very un pre planned but good. origionally it was gona be s-punk...me phil und ste...but ste couldent come...so yehr, i got ready...went to phils huuseee. the plan was to get into town as soon as possible and go madhouse then back to phils to invite people over to phils cuz his mum wasnt in (milf). listened to some A&A songs off the album at phils...humped his dog, then we went to get the train. as everyone had been at jess's now famous party, which phil got covered in shitloads of bruises cuts and scars and had a bad back (but still came out to jam at madhouse, what a soldier) so we went to check on jess to see if she was okay..she hadnt slept, didnt really look tired tho. she had done a good job of cleaning up her house although someone stole benchs fone and her ipod....she had alcohols and vibrators behind her bed (oj...no alcohol....lol oj oj, no vibrators behind her bed.........they were on the floor, lol oj NO VIBRATORS) and her cool plant...which kept bending over so we had to prop it up against a wall...she cleaned it up pretty well...in the kitchen there was a small toy metal car (1:16 scale is my guestimate of its size to be prescise) and it was in a bowl...with like, peper next to it..jess probably tried to eat it like some kind of car dinosaur. and then tallis was on the portable house fone to jess, and i spoke to her and it was cool cuz i hadnt spoken to my wife in a while. i cudent really hear it cuz of all the loud traffic. at this point i have to sencierly appologise for my wife because if youd have said you really wanted come after you turned down my fone offer we would have waited for you and met up with you and stuf..so sorry for spoiling your day wifeling i still loves yarr. then me and phil went into town after a bit more fun talk to tallis on le fonable. we saw a random bus, and it said 914 city centre...so me and phil, being random bus catching legends...got the 914...and hey presto.. GOAL....emma green even claimed it didnt exist but it led us near madhouse studios. we saw these two cornish blokes...wanted to know where sound control was...which didnt make sense, as from the direction they appoched us from, they must have been past it. so we showed them, the one guy had a famous stars and straps huddy on....so i said i liked it, and he liked mine and phils blink stuff, and he saw blink 3 times...lucky bastard. and the other bloke asked phil if sound control had any decks. and phil goes...SKATEBOARD DECKS?....lol no mayte, i think he means Dj decks...lol!!! poor phils moment of confusion...so we dropped off the nob jockeys i mean dick jockeys...dam my spelling......Disc jockeys* ..and then we arrived at madhouse, did the usual setting up...swapping drums over, i had to buy some new drumsticks..so i brought the madhouse pair...FUCKING HELL....really fat heavy maple vick firth drumsticks...no sizing on them, only the lable 'Rock'. if they were 5A's then my sisters fanny (i wish she was). so we were pretty rusty to begin with having not PLAYED WITH EACHOTHER for a while. but then things turned for the better, we have two startings for s-punk songs. a load of live endings for when we play gigs, a song like moby dick with a drum solo in it....and two punk covers, george of the jungle...(lol) and the more punk/ska cover of lean on me . we then packed up when it was time to leave, i had to carry my cymbal and stand which i took extra in two sainsburys bags (one had ripped into a hole...as the other one almost did later...........................) as im a gorm who wont buy a gig bag until we do gigs...lol the bag was chafing on my hands for the rest of the day...phil had NO money whatsoever so i let him borrow mine and pay me back, we went to mcdonalds...met gemma, her manfriend cameron and amy, we had a fun chat and walk...as people walked past right in my face to get the opposite direction to me...i would say rude things in there faces asif i was talking to gemma...e.g *hot women try to shuffle past me* so i heard dog semen is good for you but contains lots of calories* twas fun.. as we waited for the train we ate our mcdonalds...and this shaz came running onto the platform..and she was about to get on the train, when she shouted to the conductor like man...does this go to *insert some common poor STD filled town where she lived* and i shouted YES SHAZ...she said summet to me when i turned my back to her apprently...then got on the train and sat there waving and swearing at me and mouthing me off...i was like SHAZ SCUM...and then phil told me to mooney, and i was trying to but amy didnt want me to so i didnt lol...we shouted at her when the train went past after i had re done my trousers up from preparing to mooney her. then we got a train toooo. was funkey, had many conversations...i offered cameron a hand up but someone them told me he wasnt getting off so i pulled my hand away as he reached out for it and said "dont think so" as i do the dick  head signal lol..hes safe, he offered to carry my cymbal but all i wanted to do was put my coke in my other hand, so he carried it for 5 secs then i had it back off him but thanks anyway mayte. then me, phil, amy and gem went back to jess's and watched this program where they change this thing saggy skinned woman with opperation...she had loads of left over skin and phil correctly stated "her stomach looks like a second vagina" twas funny...we all had a laugh, then i put a duster between my legs to chase and poke jess with it..she didnt like it and tried to run behind me, but caught the tail end of the duster and snapped it...so sorry for partly breaking it, amy and gem left us to go have oral sex or summet...i cnt remember what. then jess's plant was bent too far, so i tried to remove it up, but it snapped...so we got superglue and tried to glue it, phil did the gluing and did a shit job...so she had to reglue it later in the correct way...lol...her parents wont find out until it dies a few weeks later. then jess was gona goto the shop, so we walked with her and split off at tescos and went to phils...me and my best spud fullop watched some road crime program..aka chavs getting owned, was funny.......then i had to go after i accidently hit phils dog when demonstrating how cops on a latenight bravo program called costa del cops or summet like tht lol hit youths who didnt do what they were told and they beat them to the ground with battons....and i just caught his dog as she sat up off my foot..no harm done tho, i made it up with PLAYING WITH HER....and her fave chew toy. then i had to go, phil still owes me to conclude but yehr, one funkey day, shame i didnt get to see my wife....also since that day, appologies for not being allowed out on friday gorgeous wife tallis, and i have also got some carbon drum sticks...black, half the weight of wooden ones, double the durability...they own, i changed all the skins on my drums today also and the combo of those two and my drum skills own . thanks for reading the blog.
 i have also got new angels and airwaves album...OWNAGE.

Tombo

RANDOM PICTURE: tis random, tis guess what...a fuckin picture..enjoy lol last day madness, great pic of me and my wife methinks

hellow mother fuckersssssssss, i had one fucking good friday, so i shall be explaing it. GOING FOR A BIG BLOGGUN! where shall i start...heres where i start, at the bloodey start. you have big boobs and i doubt your 18, do you have a note from your mum...sextastic, right then, casual mornings ofcourse..sat listening to music and sitting on msn having for once someone to talk to, emma gowen and luke...luke told me all our gnvq HAD to be in today and then told me that he had known all week, i went in a madrush to do it all thus missing brekfast....btw it didnt have to be in for the last time...and then i went to school. saw the stag and korzun came in...he said he watched big brother so i said shut the hell up chav and he grabbed me in a pretend fight way, so i just grabbed his collar and send him flying over a desk..OWNED. but on the way out the room he threw a board rubber at the door which i was walking out of, it bounced off the door and hit me in the side of the face 1-1 lol that was pretty flukey but cool. then i went to form, phil came in late as usual...cnt remember much which happened then. english was so sexy...we had a cover teacher mr burke ( TWAT ) and he favours the inteligant chavs as opposed to rockers..and we had to do a silent essay..so i threw rubber at oscarby and korzun further down the row, continuing our rubber and pen war from wednesday. then me and josh and alex had a fanny rash version of bogies game..i invented it, and then i went, josh pass me my fanny rash *points to pencil on the floor as he sits infront of me* and then josh went: your fanny rash?*slightly louder* and then alex conte went: heres your fanny rash tom...then i owned them all. preteneded to be writing and make a mistake. slammed my pencil down on the table and yelled OH FANNY RASH!!!!. mr burke (TWAT) was like....OI! no need for that...i was like...i was upset about my mistake..and he was all oh right, try to be a bit quieter then. OWNED. then maths..mr lister is always late, and has a box with his stuff in..so we locked the door on him, and when he went to push it open with his box he got owned in the face. stupid demon headmaster...then break, was foodliscious..twas funkey, then i had science which was average....but me and amy stripped. then lunchtime ownage...i got loads of hugs from everyone, specially tallis. me and ste had a laugh, but he went again..we taxted a spot off some shazes in the year below, and they took some of it back...so i sexily danced to seduce them to scare them off. just turned them on they didnt go, i handded my gnvq in, tallis was cold so i let her have my blazer, which made me 1/4 cold as my nipples didnt fully erect :P. and then i got to hug and talk to tallis loads which owned, and i let some random girl and emma green try throw a bottle in my nuts and i wouldent block it...they all missed!!!! and then i danced loads, no one would join in...until they al got cold, and made me do my gay butlins man impression and i did a butlins exercise video and everyone joined in my exerscise class :P. then tallis wrote ♥tom on my hand which was sweet . so i wrote the same back on her hand...then she wrote I ♥ tom on my face yay . then joe and alex came over and complained no one was in the mood further down the school vacinity to be hyper wiht them, so i took it to the next level...they did this flames of fire thing and it tickles your ass..they made me do it to tallis, and they also did it to other girls as an excuse for them to touch girls arses...desperate . then yehr, more lunch fun, then it was time for geo..late with ness as usual because tallis wont let me go and im not gona force her off me tbh ;) so ness waits too and gets her hugs...geog paper yerh, we all had to do them, but not in exam conditions..and at the top of this island arran on a scottish map..there was a rock called COCK OF ARRAN...so me ste and stu were laughing at it, and i drew a FAT COCK picture all over the area...then miss came over and ste bottled it, trying to shove it into a pile of nearby papers...and she goes, you havent just drawn on one of my papers,...i went no miss, she grabbed it and opened it..she went: DID YOU DRAW THIS. no mis....STEVEN DID YOU DRAW THIS...no miss, THEN WHO DID ....ughrhg...me: its okay ste ill take the blame, i did it miss..she just went...:| YOUR HAVING THAT PAPER NOW!....lmfao ...then she came back to my desk later and scribbled it out saying: *laughs* thats too detailed for comfort...its discusting...i got my tipex once she ha dleft and re drew it over her scribbling..
and then to after school time....pure class, wel all went back to our own houses..but i went back to phils..chavs had a bit of a tado with us away from school, phil played me many songs which were shit and he had mistaken for A&A because thats what they were named on a download thing..then we went to jess's to meet jess, tallis, and amy...i so sexed up jess's mum lol..she so wanted me ;). we all walked down to sutton having a laugh, heard various stories of tallis and amy pissing all over the place in rectory due to drunkness... went to TK max and tried on many bras and stuff...tallis liked this jacket thing...and her mum told her to borrow the money off sum1 and then pay them back another time...and i had 23..and it was 12..so i offered it, and she (being stubborn) would not accept it despite how much she really wanted it....so i was more stubborn and brought it for her. then we went to mcdonalds where phil was checked out by a male chav....and then we took our mcdonalds and sat under cover of marks and sparks, then i did a lil dancing and making out with the sign of a huge hippo with its mouth open on a wall about a mall :D.
then i got hugs off everyone (big one off tallis for ages) and got owned by amy who kept pushing my backwards until i ended up backing into a bin...and then i had to go and get in the car by the haha bar...it would have been really haharrr if they had got in trouble for parking there lol!!. it was wockod basicly even tho it wasnt long. the rest of it was pretty normal but that part owned ass........i also didnt get my haircut for everyone today (saturday) they dissaproved of it..so im gona get it cut next weekend, so by the time they see me properly it will have grown back a bit over half term and they wnt rlly be able to tell!.

TOMDOMS

RANDOM PICTURE: tis random, tis a picture, enjoy

heylow all, sorry i havent done this for two weeks, but the first week was SO SHIT. that tbh i didnt really want to remember it and write about it. however. this week, much better. monday....i came to school so high on nothing and i was dancing seductivly and being all hyper and people were like its a monday morning how can you be so hyper. lunch was funny, i was doing some imprssions of various people and teachers, and we were all a bit hyper so yehr funky. tuesday, i was cest absent due to school for personal weesons (period lol!!) wednesday was sexy. drum lesson= sexy, p.e = semi sexy (our team of non jocks which usually wins due to freindship was split up ) and yehr, the day in general was alright. im just quickly going through the days quickly. im listening to feeder life at radio1's big weekend. thursday, today, alright day. r.e i spent the whole lesson running around school after a folder thats now dead. history, not much really happened, break was alright, just me, jade, ness and tallis in the dinning hall surrounded by chavs discussing the size of summet, it was 92, so im guessing like what..there moms tit size. english was so fun, cover teacher who shouted at me on wednesday for climbing up the school where i shouldent be, hes a crater face...we threw rubber at eacother, then i took it to the next level by throwing parts of pen at them...bayliss ended up with rubber in his mouth, but thats life . lunch was sexual, i got loads of hugs off tallis which was sexual and wockod. and me and ste and chapman and the hoff had a laugh, but i tried to ambush the hoffs attempts to steal ste via piggy back so i jumped into him and ended up punching him in the face lol...he has a fat lip now ahahahrrr.. tallis had to leave tho to go do a english rehersal. the rest of lunch was okay, but science sucked asshole, because its boring and too hot to do science..and people seem too tense to have any fun cuz of gcse's so theyre all down and stuffs, not good. got GCSES coming up soon, not ready for them but hey what the fuck, jst give it a bash. tommorow will be alright if my maths teacher tragicly dies before the lesson, english our fat teacher will be absent again, geog will be okay, and sciecne will probably be balls....i was gona do summet after school but i duno wat to do cuz my parents want me back by 7 ish to go see my grandparents and i dont wana make everyone stay in sutton instead of going into town because i cnt go cuz by the time i get there i practially gotta go out...ill probably sod it cuz otherwise its selfish of me. even tho it would be great to see everyone more, cuz tallis never gets to see much of me so yehr. anyhoo. that was it, im too tired to write more about the week.

Tomdoms

Random picture: tis random, tis a picture, enjoy!!

heylow all, yes im still alive unfortunatly..for you. lol i shall be describing my wockod friday..day. start at school. me and ste trying to get a piece of string around a big nail in the wall so we cud hang on it and break it causing mass damage to the schools structure...didnt work. ste and co have found a mouse that lives at fairfax, i am never there early enough to see it mind...it only ventures out at about 8.30..anyhoo, saw the stag in the morning. got a hug off le tallis . went to form, phil was late as usual..me chris, bayliss and luke invented a channel 4 spin off of deal or no deal...dead or not dead. u dnt wana hit the legends who are dead. e.g john bonham, kirk cobain, elvis presley, george best...but you wana hit the low alive scum..chris evans, dale winton, cat deely lol. and instead of boxes they use mini coffins . then the usual school events took place. first english, watched a LOTF video. me and bayliss and korzun sit pretending to play the instruments when there is film music. in maths i owned mr lister...he usually likes to be sarcastic, so i was havin a good old stretch...and he goes: *in a sarcastic voice* was that a hand up or was that a yawn. and i went: neither! it was a stretch, a yawn is this *makes yawn sound*..he was like: yeh i know the actions but not the techncal names....everyone jst laughed at him..WANKURRR . then science was average methinks...we all traded places asin acted like another person, phil was amy and amy was phil, i was emma and emma was me...madness! break was the usuall. lunch me and benchhad several drum stick fights, as i attempted to protect the lovley tallis. he tried to get one off me, and he kept turning and kicking to try and get me to let go, but i kept moving and turning the opposite way to counter act it...even he said i was suprisingly really good at doing it..ownage, hes like twice my size and it looked wierd when he was running from me not the other way round..geography...miss "big heavy tits" arhtur was talking about birmingham city council putting a tram line on broadstreet...and when she said broadstreet i knew everyone was thinking prostitutes..so as usual i act as the class voice by saying" so as your on the tram you can pick up prostitutes on the way quicker"..she was like: OOOIIIYYYYYY*says in her highpitched shout*. everyone laughed so yeh clearly they were thinking it. then homotime...went back to phils as the group split up to go to our homes...i didnt have any clothes to change into so i borrowed one of phils two hoodies he got back from confronscation. went to his..made out lol oj, i did with his dog. i always remember when me, ste and phil were at phils huse and they said: i wonder what its like to eat dog food. so they made me eat the fucking dog food. it tasted sooo bad..i was nearly sick, but swallowed most of it like a good bitch. then we got on teh bus having deoderised and discussed many topics including the hotly debated topic i made up: you know men can only have one orgasm, is that a good thing or a bad.... then we got on teh buss, and soon emma, amy tallis, and jade joined us on bussling. was a laugh on bus. emma sucked phil off numerous times lol.. jade turned on what looked like eric cantona in chav clothes, jade "jaded" us all (she does this by sticking white stickers on things with the word jaded on it". i drew a heart with tallis's name in on my hand (inspired from tallis's midweek antics on her own hand) and she did the same back... we waved to many builders and other passing double decked busses, jade ranted about the 4.30 bus not being there at 4.30 lol...emma and jade were discussing my eyes....i have really nice eyes apparently lol riiight. got off bussling. cnt remember order we did things. we went bullshit i mean boring i mean bullring** to get stuff for wham babes, where we met ness and greenie...they seemed a bit down, duno why tho.we also met jess and holly and another girl for a moment outside birthdays. then we went to WH smith and jade got a set of pens and a roll of white labels to JADED more ppl. then we went mc donalds...tallis's mum wanted her to get tea there, but tallis didnt have any money..and she is stubborn so therefor she wnt let me buy her food, so i got ness to buy it..and then i payed ness secretly muhahha...she wudnet have known if ness hadnt accidently blabbed it when we went to have a mcdonalds picnic in the pidgeon parkk...we all made our own jaded stickers but with our names on...i varied mine: TOMMO'D!, master tom rodded (like rod stuart)
MEESTER TOMMO'D...and other things like those, and i climbed a lamp post and stuck it on the top..then from there on it was madness, sticking them on churchdoors, benches, posters, traffic lights...everyone did it. was gd, then we decided we shud try and tag people...and i just owned.. i walked past a man handing out leaflets..and i asked for a load...i only went and stuck my name on them all!!! then i went upto people and said: scuse me sir, can i intrest you in one of these things with my name on, thanks, have a nice day...it was crazy, i went upto a woman and her bebeh, and offered one, and she said: sure thaaanks *in american accent* and i went, you cud also let your bebeh chew on it if shes having teething problems..she laughed muhhahaha. then there were this couple sat on a bench. i wen upto the bloke (mid 20's) scuse me sir, can i intrest you in one of these things with my name on. him: whats the fucking point. me: *blanks him* one for the laydaay?..his gf: id be happy to accept one. me:*turns to him* sure you dnt want one, his and hers matching..him: whats the fucking point..his gf: hed be happy to accept one *takes one off me*..i walked off then. then i went upto this one woman, and went: can i offer you one of these things with my name on please. her: yes you can, i would accept it. *hands her leaflet* thankyou have a nice day. her: you too, tell you what, you seem like a well mannered young man, i work for a sales company, youd make a good salesman, would you be interested in a job. me: ill thik about it, you have my name anyway *points to leaflet*....w00t. then we pretty much had to go howwwwme. so we all jumped on a 10 mins later bus after greenie and ness made us miss the first one :P was funny, jade kept hitting me, and im an unathodox gentleman and i hit back so she felt the force...was great, had a laugh on the bus, i kept asking tallis: when are we gonna get off...(asin the bus ;)) to hear her joke responses....later tommo ;). then i got off the bus at a early stop nearish my house..and jade got off too, we had a cool chat about shiz before we went our seperate ways and i had to walk home in the dark on my own..some chavs came upto me and said: got anything good in the bag..so i got my drum sticks out threateningly..chav scum: whoa man calm down *walks off* haha mofos!!!, and that was my day....and my mum told me to wash the tallis thing off my hand cuz of the pen getting in my blood veins..so i went "no bitch" *wets hand a bit, and then slaps her on cheel with that hand so it leaves a wet mark of what was written on my hand...owned!! that is all, one long blog, thanks for reading it !!!

Tom

RANDOM PICTURE/S: tis random, tis a load of not so random pitures this time...

right then...tities shitties and orgasm..this is gona be a long blog i can tell...this is my week explained in vague detail..enjoy. (if you dont want to see the scores, look away now) l1cki1ng p3n1s f0r 4 j0k3...they were the scores. right then. monday!! every1 sees everyone on the first day back...some hyperness but mainly tiredness.in GNVQ it was madness, olivia larcombe came back from cyprus.and she was tanned anyway asin skin colour..and she goes to me and chris....AM I BROWN? we just looked at eacother and burst into laughter as we didnt know wht to say.
tuesday..r.e was fun, got to wear a tiara and a princess badge therefor making me a princess. i asked tallis to marry me...and she said n...yes :P. and then i picked her a daffodill. cnt remember anything else. sexy toast...wednesday (fave day of the week by far) owned so much...drum lesson, ownage..although i missed break,which made me miss tallis even more than i was already. at lunch it was funny. me phil and ste sat at a table with others including a twat turd...and he kept squirting ste and tallis so i had to sort him out (jokingly) but if he had carried on much longer i wud have snapped probably. and i poured water in phils pocket, and it was leaking into a huge puddle onto the floor where he was sat tht was funneh. i also was serious for once in my life...ask tallis cuz i dno if i can say ;). and p.e was the sex!! ste blake is a basketball legend and gets picked as a team captain..and he picks friends not the best players. so its always me ste and phil. and no one cud beat us in the winner stays on due to the combo of mainly stes, some of phils and a few of my baskets...then andre came and killed it...even tho we were better with him..its nt the point. thursday...dnt think much happened...i tried to get tallis a flower (daily flower thing i do her) then turd killed it and used it to get wasps to come near tallis and she hates him...so we un adopted him and me and tallis adopted wheatbix kid instead. i got to spend alot of lunchtime jst sat with tallis my wife which was fun :P even if she was hugging another mans huddy :O lol oj..i know you dnt have one of mine to hug yehrr:P. then we had friday off and everyone went to drayton mannor but i cudent go as it was my mothers shitty birthday...42 and shes still alive >.< lol oj :P and thats about it i think. cnt remember much else...because of wednesday which made me happy. everyone say: fuck fuck shit fuck!!

tom


Random picture: tis random,  its most definatly a mother fuckin picture......

yehrr!! on friday, it was teh sex! i went to madhouse with the most beautiful girl ever! steven!!lol nahr twas tallis:p but the legends that make up s punk came tooo, (not the only time they came that day) ste and phil!!! twas gr8 where shud i start, well at the start is always useful. picked up phil and his guitar, picked up tallis, picked up ste! on the way to madouse my dad was on the fone to a work client and he said, "well if we put it up more, and try and raise it a bit..." we al burst into laughter but phil laughed too loud and my dad was like, sorry bout tht, im with a load or morons in the car...he said it was okay cuz he had known the bloke on the fone for ages, and he laughed when he heard us laughin at what my dad said anyway..kwlness, got to madhouse! when i booked it, the woman (who according to my dad "wants my body") she asked for the band name..and i said s-punk, and she goes "oh its you isit, tell you what ill give you one of the larger rooms then (discrimination: cuz i have a big penis lol) and tit was fun, i forgot the most obvious thing needed to drum, drumsticks, on the other hand i brought an extra cymbol and stand :P..and twas good. we played many songs, didnt manage to finish of them mind, as we were rusty from not playing for about a week as we were on holiday...i couldent take a drum kit on hols, but personally he didnt have an excuse :D lol oj...and me and ste made a glade man and called it jonty, we took the jelly stuff out of the glade plastic box, used some pins off the notice board on the inside door and stuck it up there, and used pins for eyes and nose. we tried to throw him at the wall cuz they usually stick, but it didnt work, and we broke a clock last time...well i say we, more ste lifting up his base knocking it off the wall..then we threw glade at it! twas good, was a right laugh...thanks to the brilliant TALLIS. for being the bestest groupie ever and coming to so many of our practises..twas good to see my best female mate and best two mates. then on the way home they wanted mc donalds so we stopped at a drive thru chavvery thing...pretty much the end...oh and i broke the e string on phils guitar, and we continued writing our song..and my dad came to jam with us on base for 5 mins...played a right handed base with a 50p perfectly (hes left handed) twas ownage! and me and him wrote a song at home...so keep your ears and eyes open (how the fuck do you keep your ears closed!!??) for the s-punk myspace to be made by tallis when we have music to put on there :P

<<Tom>>

Random picture: tis random, tis a picture, enjoy....

also to robert bayliss...your seige, you say ypu have contacts...but i know for a fact you still wear glasses!! ha suck on that one, im so clever!

france was goooooood.

however...french chavs. god made a DOGS DINNER of that....first ever short blog, like the good old days...women upset me too much, so im pratly shutting them out a bit and forgetting about them more....just me, phil and ste....and bayliss because i cnt wait to see his revenge plotting come into work on people. and he also will get me my gcse in english and history lol


<< TOM >>

RANDOM PICTURE: tis random, tis a picture...enjoy...two of them. just like balls, speaking of which, i have balls the size of churchbells...

les dennis comment of the blog: if its there ill give you the money myself

foo fighters, stacked actors is the name of the blog......havent listened to the foo's for ages!! anyhoo, friday at school, twas a half day, so me and phil and ste decided we wud go to madhouse, it was also jess's birthday on friday. so we met up with ste at phils house...ste wa late, so we had to run for the bus, and got there as it came up to the traffic lights the other side to be bus stop, perfect timing. we got on the bus, and at the next stop our good frends tallis and emma got on (or shud i say, we got off  lol oj, you have to pay them for that kind of service) and yeh, theyre our best roadies, they came to the most practises for our band out of anyone besides me and phil obviousely. and on the bus, we had a laugh at this old man who looked like he had fallen asleep on the bus, so me and ste coughed loudley to try n wake him up incase his missed his stop...then some people came upstairs to join us, and they were of the asian race, and emma green was qouting this poem we did at skwl "wha ya mean im HALFCAST" we were all sighing, she shudent have said tht with the ppl who were sat behind her, oh dear...got dropped off in b ham, i brought some gripped 5A zildjian drum sticks from sound control for just £7.99!!!! top deal :P then we went to mad house but got lost, and sum1 had booked the room under S-PUNK 7 (like s club 7 lol!) oh dear, got our stuff, we started to destroy the room then, ste lifted his base up to plug the amp cable in, and knocked a cheap plastic clock off the wall. it broke, we put it back together but it had stopped working, so we tried to re simulate the drop, didnt work lol. then i was setting the drums up left handed and almost knocked one of the amps off the stack cuz it was loose lol. we had a good jam, played songs such as:

seven days in the sun - feeder
sef esteem - the offspring
aliens exist - blink 182
dammit - blink 182
 
and loads moreeeee..... also, we were jamming and i showed phil this beat i came up with for a metal song (altho were a punk band we wanted to do one metal song) and he managed to make up a wockod riff, so we made a song, and  named it stag after ste blake!! twas wockod, were writing a punk one atm.....when we record them ill put up links so you lot can listen. and then the time eventually came to pack up, and i punched a glade thingy off the amp onto the floor, it split open and a jelly thing came out, so ste threw it to me, and i threw it back, and he threw it at phil and he freaked out, so ste threw it at the wall and it stuck, then i picked it off and threw it at the clock, and the clock fell on the floor and smashed again, me and ste cudent breath we were laughing that hard.... we picked it up, still wasnt working, put it back and left....the woman from madhouse wanted to line us up withsome gigs, my dad reckons she was just after my body lol. and until ste leanrs base my dad plays base wokodly cuz hes been playing since he was 12, hes now 46!! so he owns, hes gona do the base for our songs, shud own. then after studio we met up with jess and her pussy i mean posse, and then we went to cinema, we saw v for vagina (vendetta), and phil wrongly had a whole bucket of popcorn poured on him by adam carpenters girlfrend....then i went home and rested my penis in my lap and went to sleep. the end.


<< TOM >>

thanks to phil, my best mate, who left me a comment on the last blog, he never usually reads them unlike some *cough* gaypiss lol....so thanks to phil and rob


Random picture: tis random, tis a picture, enjoy...FEEDER LIVE in one of the pics

 

hey all!!! its me, welcome to wednesdays deal or no deal...i shall be venturing into the pointless pubical hair rob bayliss's mother posseses...and telling you all wht im doing and what ive done!! JUST KEEP WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDING!. *makes noise like the boy whos skin fell off taking off his t shirt* anyhoo, last week was funny, i got a empty lucozade bottle, put it on the table unscrewed the lid, and smacked down my fist on it, and it shot into this counter where two dinnerwomen were selling food in the dinning hall, it pinged past there hand, smacked off the wall and rebounded. vwoilarrr...new sport invented...phil does it, smacks the lid off an asian girl in year 7's head! lmfao! it was so funny, the way that it bounced off her head (and not because she was asian) me, ste and phil were in fits of laughter, one of those laughs that you cant stop laughing and it hurts. then we all tried to aim for our frends on another table (fucking hell, were so chidish and other people like us?) garners effort missed craply, phils bounced off the floor and onto the table, my one shot past the table, hit the door, rebounded, and landed just by the side of table. everyone try it at your school/work/collage etc. i name this sport SHOTBOTTLE. it will be a new craze lol. FUCK. so yeh, thts bout it for interesting stuff done. however, p.e today! im sure il have a new tale to add to the fucking helarious things that happen in p.e (well we laughed) and i have my drum lesson! and GNVQ. oh yeh, GNVQ. my bridgewood our teacher has loads of sticks behind his desk, and he looks like fred flinstone, and when we said it was cold, islay mackinly (who looks like the lead singer of kings of leon), she told him wht we said, and he let off an evil laugh. and me chris, and luke, and rob came to the conclusion, he gets home and its dark, he calls his wife: oh wilma dear *beats a stick in hand* *lets off an evil laugh*
mrs bridgewood: please jon, dont do it, not today *lets off scream in the dark and all you can hear is the repeated beating of a stick* lol!!! the fun things we discuss eh!
ANDY PETERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thats about it, do you want fries with that ASSHOLE.
oh saturday...IM GOING TO SEE FEEDER!!! ive waited since december the 4th when they canceled because grant the lead singer strained vocal cords the NIGHT BEFORE MY GIG, arsefeck. but now its so close! and ill get to see theyr new song live too (lost and found), and its soooo wockod

<< TOM >>

you get more value for money on my blogs, robs just have naked women on it, and for that stuff just use google guys!

UNSAFE SEX PAYS! SO HAVE LOTS AND YOULL BE RICH!!

RANDOM PICTURE: tis random, tis a picture, enjoy, two for wednesday, as the kerrang saying doesnt go! THAT MAN LOOKS LIKE BAYLISS!!!

heyloww allll. im going to be telling you about what happened last friday and rest of the week so far.and if you dont want to see the scores...look away now!. ofcourse when you look away im gona still dictate them too to kill off the element of suprise.... right! friday... was fun, me phil and eddy went to madhouse...eddy fucked off sumwhere. then tallis and emma  came. twas fun. we wernt in the musical mood much. so after madhouse we went to mcdonalds...where we all got high on the food!!. we went to the bullshit i mean boring i mean bullring! it was fun...i was hyper so i breakdanced in the middle of the bullring to the sound of the flinstones theme music...people were watching me aswell..*claps me on* woot! lets get the cat dancing. and after tht...we were about to get train. and me dad said he was gona pick me up!!we all had return tickets. silly nob. so we all stood there making accents up...i did jose mouriniho but phil, tallis and emma wudent know who it was...so i jst kept saying everything in portugese..tallis did a funny accent. i was like "vat ess this....police?? back in my country we call them fatboy!? no?..fatty fatty bum bum....vant another creeemcayke? eh fat bastud" and stuff like tht...twas fun, we all did stuff like tht back home in the carrrr....my dad gave everyone a lift. and we were in the que at drive thru at mcdonalds cuz my sisters wanted some food too, and the guy infront dropped his money....as we were hyper we got more over exited about this and laughed our heads off....we all laughed quietly, but emma let off a huge loud laugh and the guy who dropped his money turned round to stare at our car. and emma jst cudent stop! my dad tutted and wound the window up to try and muffle the sound...dnt think it worked, and then the woman at the drive thru was russian...adding to our accent list, we all jst stared at eacother as she talked, trying not to laugh...well, all except...EMMA, she burst out laughing in the womans face lol....deary me, then everyone got dropped off and tht was it. as for the rest of the week..nothing much happened monday, tuesday i missed skwl due to PARSONAL reasons (bayliss wud get it) but still managed to ask ness to goto the prom with me...she said YUS ...yay :).
wednesday was funny at lunchtime and in p.e...lunchtime, ness, ste, phil, me, tallis and emma all sat in the dinnning hall, having a laugh...i threw a coin at emma and she kept batting them away, one of the pranged off the window....not even a scratch...phew, me and ste doing our impressions of the boy whos skin fell off.... and phill had a white bottle lid in his mouth, and i said drop it, so he did, and i swung my bottle at it and hit it perfectly onto a table across the other side of the room....textbook, then the dinner ladies came over, and told the table where it landed to get out cuz they were throwing stuff at us lol...woooops. p.e is always fun!! our great team of people who arent jocks!! we still own tho. team grebo we were called in the end! cuz chavs call some of us grebos,so i thort it wud make a good team name, also on the list was my idea: team covalent bonding (random), chris wrights: team fried egg..etc lol we lost all our games, but we had such a laugh, and like we had team hughs and good team spirit! and ste was running, and he twisted his leg, he made a noise like the boy whose skin fell off, and looked like joe, this kid at our skwl with a leg problem where he limps on one leg...we kissed stes leg better ;) lol... and at the edn of p.e its tradition me and ste spray white marks on peoples shorts n trousers with deoderant... and ste let me spray a mark in the shape of 2 balls and a penis...twas fun, and when ste went to drink his water...it was pretty much empty...so i squeezed it gently, and ste let a waterfall out...choking up a huge puddle on his bag, he couldent stop laughing and i patted his back to stop him chocking while in fits of laughter looking at his bag...thursday now....was funny in english...bayliss was eating, and josh shouts: ITS NOT A PERSONAL DINNING ROOM ISIT BAYLISS! and our english teacher stares at him as bayliss tries to cover his face...mrs ford goes: robert.
Rob: (saying with a bulge of food at the side of his cheek and hes stuffing a noisy baguette wrapper into his pocket: yes?
miss: dont eat in my lesson, im very dissapointd in you, get rid of it
rob: sorry, but can i finish this bit first!

wheyyy, classic!!! and then at lunch, funny moment....mr maguire was talking to sum1 bout gnvq, and i was sat next to rob who hes talking to, mocking him to ste and luke (because hes a scouser) and mr maguire went....errr, mr lewis

me: evening sir
mr maguire: if you dont shut up, im gona get my size 8 and ram it up your jaksie, alright? so far, you wont be able to get it back down
me: i hope your talking about your shoe sir...8 cm is very small otherwise *does weiner signal with little finger*
*we all sit ther in fits of laughter...as soon as he said size 8 and ram and jacksie you can tall me rob, luke and ste jst thought...PENIS!!* twas funny, and thts jst about it..... thankyou for enduring one of my longest blogs ever!!! stay cool, check your crazy selves out laturrrrrrrrrrrrrr,


<< TOM >>

RANDOM PICTURE: tis random, tis a picture, enjoy....

hey there all....the title is only because gayliss asked me too. right, where to start!!. ill start here .......okay then, there should be a chav hallacaust, and if the blog offends you bugger off and stop reading it then...comments r welcome tho..it wont do anything tho. my mate chris had a confrontation with a chav in which he performed a classy move, pushing the chav, then as he rebounded swinging a roght hook at his face....hes now suspended...........for one day lol. all because chavs were being dicks. today me and my mates r fucking off to madhouse studios in birmingham..i cant wait! it shall own... and over the past few days a few events have happened. my mates were stood talking in english...i ran over to them and shouted...I LICKED OUT MRS GADD IN HER BIG FAT SALTY....and as i got to pussy, i stopped....i had a strange feeling. it was my large english teacher stood right behind me....woooops! lol.and she caught me eating minni cheddars in her lesson.errr wht else, basketball owned on wednesday...ste blake was one of the captains. and he picked a mates team  even tho we suck at basketball apart from ste...and we were wockod and i scored a flukey three pointer...i got past one of the good people who r in the basketball team for school and i span round him and jst shouted shit and tre the bal frantically at the board...and it went in...OH YER. ste blake and phil r legends...other stuff happened but i cant really remember much of it.oh yeh.. my parents think im not doing enough work for my GCSE's this year...yet i do all my hwk,. and ill star revising soon when i have more work to revise from. anyhoo thts about it.

*steals idea off bayliss*

gay of the week: alex oscarby
MILF of the week: alex oscarbys mum
horniest girl off the week: Ness
song line of the week:and after supper her brother showers twice a week, he kicks my ass so much that fucking white inbred (blink 182 - voyeur)

"hey you better rub that shit eating grin off your face cuz this songs a sad one, and more importantly if your
eating shit and smiling this probably isnt your day"

leeve a comment  if you will, i shall return the favour...


<< TOM >>

RANDOM PICTURE: tis random, tis a picture, enjoy...click on it for animation

hello all, long time no blog, not like you give a shit anyway, apart fromy ou bayliss, yes say hello to your mum for me....anyhoo, this week i have been at school...as opposed to becoming a chav and smoking on the lodge,spreading my STD's by having sex with all th sluts...and it has been alright..in RE on tuesday was funny and insulting, on the table of four at the back, me, rob bayliss, phil and chris had a laugh...it pissed off our teacher, and she shouted at us even when we wernt talking....WDF. anyhoo, she couldent not laugh at the jokes we made so it was alright, twas so funny, and then all of the other girls r sitting there....telling us stuff like: urr your so immature, you need to grow up, how can you laugh at things like that, youll never get married (because we were doing about relationships in RE)....that last comment upset phil but i delt with it lol...i made her appologise at the school gates when i saw her, it was either that or the blowjob, so she chose the blowjob and i was like no...appologise...THEN give me the...lol oj, no penis's were hurt in the making of that appology....anyhoo, me, phil and ste r gona goto mad house studios in b ham again sooon....and if your still reading this blog, then watch out for my version of rob bayliss's shit calamity 678....he wrote a crap story and i will be topping it sometime when i can be arsed. woot its wednesday!! DRUM LESSONS...yay, they rock....and im running out of stuff to talk about....the IT crowd is such a funny program, and my name is earl is good....watch them on channel 4..ahhr yesh, i made a couple of BEBO quizes if any of you want to take them..... the adress for them is:  http://bebo.com/QuizTakeRegistered.jsp?MemberId=322624742&QuizId=322629932 and! http://bebo.com/QuizTakeRegistered.jsp?MemberId=322624742&QuizId=352273704  have fun!..anyhoo, coursework sucks cock at school,and i really couldent give a fuck about revision atm...just too tired...mr lister= cock nosed bastard anyhoo! hope your all okay, if anyone who likes perverted comedic *streightens tie* people and lives in the birmingham area and is hot and 16 then im here lol oj....anyhoo im off now,

<< TOM >>

RANDOM PICTURE: TIS RANDOM, TIS A PICTURE, ENJOY....

hey all, how are your mofo'd selves. half term, woot, has been fun, but i have so much work left to do cuz i havent done any so im screwed, not literally unfortunatly, but sex wouldent solve my homowork problem, unless it was a fit clever bonable woman.....anyhoo, on friday last week, it was a half day, me, phil and ste hopped on a train, and went to mad house studios, it was wockod, we rented ste a base, and me and phil jammed, almost perfected dammit now..and we booked the room under our band name: S- PUNK...and the woman laughed at it, she said: i hope thats because your spunky guys, not something rude. i told her to shake my hand, and she goes, not if your spunky...and i said: dont worry luv im left handed :P...and she did actually shake my handdd :). then me and ste and phil hung out and about town, then me and ste took phils guitar to hise house cuz phil stayed in town, and his mum wasnt in, so ste kept it at hise house. then on tuesday......was wockod, went to town again, me phil and ste met up with: emma, tallis, ness, jess, joe bench..and many more random and not so random people, we hung out and around town, was again a laugh....every time tallis said come me and ste looked at eacother and laughed cuz it was like she was saying cum,...teehee, man were childish. then me and phil went back to his, and then went to tallis's party...that was okay, so many random people there, all of them pissed, one of them trying to be gay to me,...i was so worried, i could only push his drunken sole away from me for so long, and then i got annoyed bout summet and decided i was gona go, so i got my parents to give me a lift home. thursday.........what an eventfull day today. went to madhouse again, me, phil and ste own, and ste's taking up base! :D...yay. this fit ish woman came into fix the microphone, and she asked someone to say summet into the mic to see if it was working, so i ran upto it and shouted: ORGASM!!!. she turned round and stared at me...i think she may have been having one ;)....tallis and emma green came to watch us play, but i was knackered by the time they got to mad house so my drumming wasnt 100% but it kicked ass apparently so thats okay...me and phil play mainly blink 182 stuff. then we went to try and get freebies from kerrang, the woman wouldent let us in, and she was hot, so we flirsted through the speaker in the wall to her, and she responded, she so wanted us lol ;) then we all went to mc donalds, i got ste a coke, me a coke and two large fries. i payed with a £20 note right, and the guy gave me like 46 p change, claimined that i only played with a £5.!!!! i was so pissed off, i had a go at him, he wouldent give me the £15 he owed me, and then was i walked away emma green heard the guy behind the counter say: tha bloke just said he payed with 20 when the till says he payed with 5...and the woman who he said it to went: yes, THEY try to do that alot........i was outraged, i took £34 with me to town, payed £10 at mad house which meant i have a £20 note and 4 pounds...my dad's pissed off at them for not beleiving me so hes gona give them a bollocking....stupid maccy d's chavs with there grease...anyhoo, got the bus back, went to phils, and hung at out his, that was fun...this girl *does not say name, even tho she wont read this* says lmfao to like everything, is she pissed, had too much laughing gas? people dont use lmao and lmfao properly anymore....how can the words: your dog can stay at my house. be worth a lmfao lol, anyhoo. better do some work tommorow, i missed so many deal or no deals too :(....oh well, i enjoyed half term.im off you crazy cats....rob bayliss....you daft sod!


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RANDOM PICTURE: TIS RANDOM, TIS A PICTURE, ENJOY... THE ULTIMATE BLOWJOB!!

hey all, the past 5 days i have been ill, even passed out....but deal or no deal has always been there for me. its the best tv show in the world.....anyhoo. went to school today...was alright, bit boring, was so funny in RE though, me and phil having fun laughing at his fit mum (shes not really a MILF lol!) and miss bursnell said we didnt have girlfrends because we were immatune, she just asked us if we had gfs cuz she was interested lol (only joking guys, no pedofilia here) anyhoo the IT crowd on channel 4 is SO FUCKING FUNNY! i laughed my ill head off at it....also, im now 16. it was my birthday last wednesday...thanks to ness for the card and prezzie, and thanks to ste the stag for my card...STE'S A LEGEND... going to the mad house studio on friday to jam with phil , and weel probably go in half term, were gona go recording studio too maby should own, and if me phil and ste hang in town aswell its gona be very funny....cant wait. TOO MUCH COURSEWORK at the moment, need to finish mr best enligsh for friday and i havent done any, and need to make my matha finished in the next two weeks and then i think weel be okay. wednesday tommorow...w00t, gota catch up GNVQ but apart frm tht i have my wockod drum lesson.........and P.E! pe rocks, tis funny, im off now........this blog was in honour of robert bayliss, the poor sod.


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RANDOM PICTURE: TIS RANDOM, TIS A PICTURE, enjoy........this guy must be the biggest gorm ever!!!!

heylow all, me havent updated this shit in a while. well school has been a bit suck ass at ze moment, i think everyones grown up apart from me and ste nd phil....so theyre all being a bit booring and focussed on coursework, give it a few weeks theyle be okay........on friday, was like, the best moment ever, my music room finally got its main purporse fuffilled, when phil brought his guitar and hyawwwwge amp to my house and we jammed.......it kicked ass, hes a good guitarist.. we played dammit loads of times, but wernt sure weather to play non live or non live version, and were gona release our own pisstake version of wake me up when september ends by greenday..phil was screaming the words out of tune deliberatly, it was so funny....and my dad came in and killed it with his guitar skills........he just showing off cuz he played base and lead for most of his life, phil wasnt happy lol...he gave phil handy advice tho. and he asked phil a question about his amp as we were about to leeve, and i knew as soon as he said it phil was gona put a gay reply in for a joke lol....dad: phil do you want this in the middle or up the back.....phil: i dont mind luv *meow* was so funy. but  me ans phil rock as a two man band until ste gets his base and then we will have a threesome............... lol oj, i like female tits and pussy too much to be gay anyhoo....but me and phil r gona enter a talent contest thingy at school, and like, most shit people r entering it, so if we play dammit live (by blink 182) well enough we'd probably win, plus all mine and phils mates r gona vote for us and cheer us, and they have loads fo mates, and are loud and gobby, so we'd get a good reception. thats bout it, phil may come over to jam next friday i hope, tis my birthday on the 31st jan, so if anyone tries to give me digs..........probably someone gay who takes it to far like rob hill.....then ill hit them back, or get phil to hit them back harder....go on luv, STICK YOUR TITS IN THE TOASTER...mmm baps.catxh your bad flipflops out laterrrrrrrrrrrrrr


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RANDOM PICTURE: TIS RANDOM, TIS A PICTURE, ENJOY\

hoooooooooooooooooowdy ho kids!! *says in mr hankey the christmas poo voice* so yeh, first three days of school, were alright, but not one day did i sleep well before so i probably wasnt too energetic...got some exams back, the two exams i thought id failed i got the highest scores in...so i was annoyed, i actually WANTED to fail...lol. then on friday after school i chilled out with my wockod mate (and ex wife....i didnt even really hump anyone)  Tallis ...twas fun, she too was tired so we didnt really do much, after the love making (by the way i am only joking...) so we went with tori to drop her off at her house, then went to tesco's to get tallis summet to eat, had some interesting convos on the way there lol.... went to phils house to stalk him for a bit, that was funny, we took this piss out of a spanish learning childs program..... were gona goto chip shop but the que was too long, so we jst went home....tallis hates loosing and when i took my blazer off to offer it to her cuz she was shivvering and i was alright with my man tettys...she got annoyed cuz i wouldent put it back on, she said she wouldent talk to me again, so i pretended to walk off the other way and she shouted my name...and she was like: dam you you made me talk, now put your blazer back on mr....so i gave in to the pretty lady lol....then we went to tallis's where we took some photos of us....she mainly took photos of me which defeated the whole point of getting photos of us together lol....we watched pimp my ride uk.....and i came up with a new version called: PIMP MY MUM YOU GAY!....sounds fun. then jimmy came home and kept offering me food and drinks, but i wasnt hungy or thirsty, and me and tallis had a laugh while jimmy bummed off upstairs i think, and mrs tallis's mate came round...she swore alot: hey tallis will you tell us when that bb's on, cheers bab, you know that one, what the FUCKS his FUCKING name now, you know, that FUCKER, the one in that FUCKIN band, not glc, the other FUCKER...yeh she meant the guy dressed as the woman but i cant remember his name now....me and tallis had a laugh acting out a slutty program on horror channel lol....tallis was the evil woman in the leopard skin outfitt lol....then eventually i had to fuck off...tallis kept trying to force me to goto teen culture on saturday but i didnt want to, plus i had fuck loads of work to do, and then phil, mike, jess and ness tried to force me to goto TC....apparently they all said it was boring and the best part was going home and getting there...and some of them missed me lol.....ahh well. thats bout it methinks.... my BIRTHDAY SOON, i wont tell you when ill leeve you to guess...

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RANDOM PICTURE: TIS RANDOM, TIS A PICTURE, ENJOY....

hellow all, im piss bored so im writing this shiz , funk yeh rudeboi , cut me some skin rude missy boy word....and all that shit, ganster rapper crap arsee tit faces...anyhoo, yeh, x mas was good, hung out with phil on thursday...was wockod...we got high on sugar....reeeeeeeeeeely high, and i scared him by pretending to be gay, cuz he was pretending to be gay, so i started to undo my zipper and he got so freaked out lmao was great....and then he shot me three times with a fucking bb gun...bastard, then i found a plastic small penguin wish you wind up and chocolate shit balls come out, i put that on phils table, and i said shoot tht frm the back fo your room......first time, streight in the head, knocked the head off, all the choco shites poured out lol...was gr8. and then on new years eve i went to tallis's new year party...wich everyone but me, hannah, adam and jimmy and ness got pissed.. hannah was annoying and decided to pour j20 over me for being perverted...WDF!!! anyhoo, that aside, adam looked after nathan, a randomer who was sick twice, me, ness and jimmy had to look after the rest, i had to hold emma green up 9 times and once outside when she passed out, i had to catch her outside so she didnt fall on the pavement....then phil got mega wierd cuz alcohols a depressant and tried to walk off outside pissed with no shoes on, me and ness tracked him down while emma green chased us to meet him, and thts when she was going back inside she stumbled so i ran after her to stop her falling lol...we got phil back inside... the shooless n00b..and emma and phil went upstairs to chat alone cuz they were both drunk, and thought they upset ecother, no one ever found out wht happened, n they cnt rmember...i told perverted jokes all night which went down well, and we had a convo about how to die in style, and i came up with the winner...jump off the wall of china masterbating....and i won sexiest person at the party award but they must have all been pissed by then lol....so yeh, average night, spent most of it looking after everyone, i didnt mind looking after tallis pissed cuz she was funny, and shes my wife so its alright...she hugged me and fell asleep....so i had to lay her down slowley on the floor, i wedged a pillow under her head and put a twister mat over her as a bed cover lol...phil was funny for a while when he was on the high stage of alcohol, shitting himself laughing when i threw a twister board at cherrys head and she dented the corner, and everyone laughed when they were pissed and i described a dick as being: a purple headed love warrior....but yeh, alcohol sucks, glad i only brought two 4 packs of stella and didnt drink any of it lol.....got a few pics of me at the party... i put feeder and blink on and alien ant farm, and everyone suddenlt got up all three times and went mad dancing, that cheered everyone up, but i couldent sleep over so i ad to leeve at 2 am...suck fest, thats bout it tho......see you later crazy cats


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RANDOM PICTURE: TIS RANDOM, TIS A PICTURE, ENJOY....